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I am 12 tips to surviving a pesky in-law.

30 Jun

Disclaimer: All the characters mentioned in this article are fictional hallucinations only. Any similarities to actual persons, places or events are purely coincidental and mildly unintentional.

Getting married entails the privilege of adding fifty relatives to your family tree. In a basket full of delectable and crunchy apples, there should be a couple of rotten ones to spoil your fun. Here are my 12 fool proof tips to surviving a pest-y, I mean pesky in-law.

1. In the words of Rachel Leigh Cook.. be silent, be still, be silent, be still– because anything you say can and will be used against you. Pesky people will promise you that.

Avoid

Avoid!

2. Read the line Avoid loud and aggressive persons;
they are vexatious to the spirit.”
100 times before you sleep. Frame it on your wall if you have to.

3. When you’re angry, count 1 to 10 backwards. When you’re really really angry, count 1 to 100 backwards. So on and so forth.

4. Smile, though your heart is aching. Smile, even though it’s breaking. Wait! That’s a song right?

Smile!

Smile!

5. Let her play alone with your child but first, teach your little tyke a lesson on self defense. Hiyaah!

6. Never draw first blood unless your name is John Rambo.

7. Never do business with her unless she promises to put up the capital, give you all the profit and migrate to Timbuktu.

8. Speak only when you’re spoken to. What’s the point of getting up close and personal with someone you don’t like (vice-versa) anyways?

9. Of the thirty-six strategies, fleeing is best. Avoid confrontations as much as you can. And please, for the love of God, live in different buildings!

10. Blog about it and tell everybody you’re just joking.

Blog!

Blog!

11. Take comfort in the fact that your husband hates her too but can’t get rid of her because they’re blood related. For what it’s worth, he’s in deeper shi*t than you are.

12. Always know where you stand. Even if you’re not the crazy bitch around here, blood will always be thicker than water. Just like in your own family.

Lesson learned. Pesky in-laws are like diabetes, it’s going to be there forever but there are a lot of ways to work around it.

Now what are you waiting for? Start smiling sideways!

 
13 Comments

Posted by on June 30, 2009 in People, Personal

 

13 responses to “I am 12 tips to surviving a pesky in-law.

  1. elmot

    June 30, 2009 at 4:15 pm

    ahaha! thanks for the tips nobe. now i know what to do with my pesky in-laws ehehe!

    if i may add, counting 1-100 is not enough…for me i count 1-1000, ehehe! and sometimes im getting the feeling that i am actually john rambo or john cena.

     
  2. Nobe

    June 30, 2009 at 5:23 pm

    hahahaha! at may isang naka-relate. baka sabihin mo totoo ito ha. joke lang to. hehe.

     
  3. ceblogger

    June 30, 2009 at 5:52 pm

    di ako maka-relate. i have an excellent relationship with my in-laws.

     
  4. Nobe

    June 30, 2009 at 6:19 pm

    ako rin! hehehe. honestly, i have said, i have a great relationship with my in laws. meron lang iba na di ko talaga ka-level in mind and body. hahaha!🙂

     
  5. tnoi

    June 30, 2009 at 6:27 pm

    hahay, buti na lang wala akong in-laws!

     
  6. Nobe

    June 30, 2009 at 6:32 pm

    hahaha!

     
  7. Badong

    June 30, 2009 at 9:32 pm

    hehe. naku buti na lang malayo pang magkaron ako ng in-laws. hopefully maka-vibes ko sila.

     
  8. Nobe

    July 1, 2009 at 7:53 am

    next year badong baka meron na. malay natin. hehehe.

     
  9. T

    July 2, 2009 at 1:44 am

    HAHAHA!!! winner!!! got no problem with this, so far my husband and i are a team and our so called in laws… are well just in laws. pesky or not, we’re far away from them! LOL!

     
  10. Nobe

    July 2, 2009 at 9:44 am

    sometimes, it’s not the parents that’s the problem. (wink) ehehehe.

     
  11. Nobe

    July 2, 2009 at 9:45 am

    hi T,

    you really have a lovely website by the may. gigutom ko. haha!

     
  12. T

    July 4, 2009 at 3:49 pm

    nobe, bisaya ka? where you from btw? you are a sweet surprise online! your blogs are refreshing!

     
  13. Nobe

    July 4, 2009 at 9:47 pm

    @T: i don’t know how to answer your question. haha! ilongga ako. then nakapag-asawa ako ng bisdak. hehe. sa liloan amo balay.🙂

     

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